healing came by song

This morning as I was sititng in church my emotions were kind of running wild. As some of you know, I have been waiting for some test results. I was supposed to hear by letter or by phone call before tomorrow, and if not I am to call tomorrow. My doctor told me to pray for a letter because I didn't want a phone call. So I've been praying for a letter, my small group has been praying for a letter, and my family has been praying for a letter. Along with anyone praying from my blog.

I have not received a letter and I have been worrying about it. I even broke down to Missy at the crop last night because I try to be so brave and not let it bother me for the sake of Mike and Jocelyn. The truth is that I have been afraid to make the call tomorrow if a letter does not arrive. I think it's becaus I know that if they called me it wasn't going to be good news and so if I have to call them I just feel like it won't be good either. I know I should just make the call and hope for the best, but it's hard because I'm human.

However, sitting in church this morning, dreading the call I'm going to have to make tomorrow, a song made it all come together. The song was "You never let go" by Matt Redman. Now this is a song that we sing a lot at New Pointe, and I know that it's true, but today it struck me a little different. If you don't know the song, some of the lyrics are as follows:

...I will fear no evil

for my God is with me

and if my God is with me

Whom then shall I fear?...

...Oh no, you never let go

through the calm and through the storm

Oh no, you never let go

in every high and every low

Oh no, you never let go

Lord, you never let go of me...

...Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on

And there will be an end to these troubles

But until that day comes

Still I will praise You, still I will praise You...

As we were singing the words to this song, and peace just came over me, because it's so true, God is there all the way through, He never lets go of us, so what is there to be afraid of? He's right beside me, and I'm the only one that chooses to walk with Him or without Him. One day, there will be an end to these troubles, but as long as I am dealing with them I just need to let God handle the problems that are bigger than me and just praise Him. I know that sometimes that's harder than it sounds, but it's time to let go and let God.

I do have to make this phone call tomorrow and I ask you all to pray for me. I will be praying to, for God's love and strength to comfort me regardless of the news. It's all in His plans, and I am just here to worship Him, so whatever he has in store for my life is going to happen, but instead of being so stressed out about it, still I will praise HIM!

Thanks for all the prayers, I truly appreciate it. A special thanks to Missy for just letting me express myself last night, it was a big help and I really appreciate you listening...I LOVE YOU!