It's time to start that diet!

I hate to say it, but it is, everyone has been talking about their diets and how much they have lost so far this year...so curiosity tried to kill this fat cat!!!! What did I do you ask? I decided to hop on the scales and see where I stand. My eyes bulged out of my head as the scale went around to 285 pounds. I was at grandma's and her scale only goes up to 275, so at first I was confused to see I weighed 5 pounds, but then reality sank in and I was about to cry. It's not what others think that gets to me, and I know that God loves me no matter what, but I have been extremely unhealthy ever since Jocelyn was born. She is now 10 months old and I started thinking about her growing up. As it is I'm too tired to play with her when I get home from work and I rarely have any energy. I want to be the mom that has the energy to run around with her kids and play with them. I want to be that mom that sets up the coolest birthday parties (on a budget) and has the most time to spend with her kids. I want to be the mom that lives to be a great-grandmother, not the kind that dies of a heart attack before her firstborn even graduates high school because her arteries were completely clogged with junk! I had Jocelyn last March, and after I gave birth to her I was just 210 pounds. Now, that was heavier than I wanted to be but I had a very positive outlook on it, because I was going to lose that weight, but I lost focus and got lazy about it. It's to the point that I don't even enjoy shopping and I got mad at myself this weekend because I went to get some new work clothes and had to buy a bigger size than I've ever worn before. I want to be able to shop in the stores that everyone else does instead of feeling bad when a friend asks me if I want to go shopping and then I can't get anything at the store, and I know better than to even try it on.

I look for this diet to be a success, because I'm not doing just for me or for my husband, I'm doing this for my child. So that when she looks back on her mom, it isn't memories of a woman coming home from work, sitting on the couch, eating ho-hos and drinking a can of pop. Not that that's the picture I've painted now, but you get the idea.

Wish me luck, it's time to get serious!